The man / woman thing

[vdubgirl 3]

lol Have a read of this it made me giggle

I never quite figured out why the sexual urges of men and women

differ

so much.

And I never figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing.

I have never figured out why men think with their head and women

think

with their heart.

I have never figured out why the sexual desire gene gets thrown into

a

state of turmoil, when it hears the words "I do"

FOR EXAMPLE:

One evening last week, my wife and I were getting into bed. Well,

the

passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says "I don't feel

like

it, I just want you to hold me."

I said "WHAT???!!! What was that?!"

So she says the words that every husband on the planet dreads to

hear..."You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman

enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man."

She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me

for

who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night I went to

sleep.

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time

with

her.

We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big

unnamed

department store.

I walked around with her while she tried on several different very

expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take so I told

her

we'll just buy them all.

She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said lets

get a

pair for each outfit.

We went to the jewellery department where she picked out a pair of

diamond earrings.

Let me tell you, she was so excited. She must have thought I was one

wave short of a shipwreck.

I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis

bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis. I think I

threw

her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey."

She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the

excitement.

Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, "I think this is

all

dear, let's go to the cashier."

I could hardly contain myself when I blurt out, "No honey, I don't

feel

like it."

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a

baffled

"WHAT??!!!"

I then said "Really honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a

while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man

enough

for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman."

And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me I

added,

"Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I

buy

you?"

Apparently I won't be having sex again until sometime after pigs fly

over a frozen hell

[Pittuf 0]

heh heh, sounds like one of my m8's relationships. His missus hates it when she's not in control and the tables are turned. lol

[ Edited Thu May 20 2004, 06:52PM ]

[antera309 3]

ROFL.

So true, so true.

[Eat this 2]

as above lol